Saturday, 21 August 2010

I am not proud of myself AT ALL

I have nothing to be proud of to be honest. I've spent the last few days feeling sorry for myself, watching Sex And The City and lying on the sofa thinking about getting a job. I did do a CV and filled out a couple of application forms, but right now I can't bother myself to do anything.
I have to go to my mother's tomorrow and collect a couple of my things. Oh yeah, I should explain that. I've been kicked out and am currently living with my dad. It isn't as bad as it seems, I've had a lot of support off by friend's, without them, I would be completely fooked, which wouldn't be good.
I'm bricking it for tomorrow I really am, I don't know how she's going to react to me showing up there.
Also, I know this is going to sound silly, but I've been having bad dreams about getting bad results on result day. If I don't do well, I'm going to be so dissapointed. I'm not bothered about french, I know I'm going to fail that any way, so I'm not all too bothered, but my Grandad was saying ealier this week "I bet you get A's in everything" Talk about pressure.
So that got me thinking
Why does people's opinions matter so much?
They shouldn't really, We should do our best for our selves, not because someone else says we should be good at something. Really, we should aim to acheive our own goals, not the goals out parents or friends set for us. Maybe if we did that we wouldn't feel so dissapointed if we don't achieve the goals we set, because then we're only letting our selves down and not everyone else, and I think that's why people get upset when they don't do as well as predicted, because they care too much about what other people thing of them.
So all I can say in conclusion is that in future we should set realistic goals for ourselves, and not set them because others tell us that we should be achieving more

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