Long Time No See / Sound Track Of My Life

Well, it's been a while. Due to the not so recent death of my laptop, i've been finding hard to get access to the internet and therefore being unable to blog, which isn't good because I have so much to talk about!

So, about two weeks ago I started talking to my ex boyfriend again. I know what you're thinking "Why in gods name did you do that?" and the answer to that is, I have absolutly no idea! Seriously, I don't know what possesed me. Maybe it was jelousy that my friend was talking to him, or maybe it's because I couldn't hold back much longer, I guess I'll never know.

I landed myself in a big mess when I asked if he would be intrested in a date with my friend. He said no because he never really got over me. So here I am sitting next to my friend thinking ohpoo,ohpoo,ohpoo!!! What am I supposed to say to her? I tell her he didn't text back. I ended up telling her that He did text back but he said no because he has strong feelings for someone else, I couldn't tell her it was me....

So I went to see the Ex after a few nights of soppy text messages to each other and alot of tears and confusion. I'll spare you the messages because you might just be sick on your computer and I don't want that to happen, but I'll tell you that he said that he still loves me and I still love him.

we went out as just friends and let me tell you, it was good to see him again, and just as a friend too because it cleared my head alot. I still love him, but I have much more important things to be worrying about such as school and college to be worrying about a relationship with my Ex right now.

Anyway, I'm going to get onto my soundtrack for this week, because It seems to me that I've neglected it a little.

10) Northern Downpour - Panic! at the Disco

9)What Your Boyfriend Said - Little Man Tate

8)Lithium - Nirvana

7)Poker Face - Lady Gaga (the one on live lounge, not the origonal)

6)Love Song - Four Years Strong

5) Turn It Off - Paramore

4)Same Jeans - The View

3)Read My Mind - The Killers

2)I don't care (this is why we can't have nice things) - The Blackout

and the song of the week this week is....

1) New Shoes - Paolo Nutini

I absolutly love this song, it is like the ultimate feel good song. I just love paolo nutini in general because he has an amazing voice I less than 3 him (l)

and the song of shame this week is....

Party In the U.S.A - Miley Cyrus.
Seriously girl, grow up!

AND stop posting raunchy phtots of yourself on the internet if you want to be respected as a person you just don't do that, it's not right, your supposed to be a girl that smaller girls look up to and be all, "One day I'm gonna be just like Hannah Montana". Yeah I wouldn't want to be like you thanks.

It's great to be able to say "I'm over you" and mean it

Thats it.

It's an amazing feeling. Well, the realisation that your over him is an amazing feeling.
You see, I didn't even realise untill I went to bed one night and I though "I didn't even pause at the bottom of the street to see if he was there". I hadn't thought about him all day and when I did, I felt nothing. No regret and no love for him at all. Not even the niggeling "like" feeling you get about some guys.

Another way I realised I was over him was that I was finally looking at other guys and potentials, hell I even flirted on a few occasions.
I've started likeing another boy, I actually like him a while back but didn't do or say anything about it.
So who knows what the future holds for me, and if the past is anything to go by then the future looks eventful.

My Feet Keep Taking Me To Your Street Because Theres A Chance I'll Meet You

Okay, so not literally, but my thoughts keep taking me to a specific subject.
Read my blogs much? Then you'll know exactly what thought I'm talking about.
No? Okay, I'll clue you in, A certain tall, bluey-green eyed boy that I broke up with a few months ago. Yeah, I know what you're thinking, GET OVER HIM ALREADY!!!! But it's harder than I thought it would be.
I keep remembering every moment we shared and all the funny things that happened around us, like the mini chavs that asked if we had sex...

me: *chokes* no!
Person G: *blushes* .....
mini chavs: are you sure??
me+Person G: *nods*
mini chavs: ahh okay *leaves*
Person G: Oh..My..God...
me: *dies*
Persons : *kisses me*
mini chavs: *From behind bush* GET A ROOM!

or the time we got attacked by a dog in the park, the same day he through his shoes in the stream because of blisters.
or the time that old man came up to us in the park and asked us to open his bottel...which he didn't have with his imagionary dog... i felt awful for him.

oh shut up me.
I never used to know how to describe how I felt for him untill I heard this Panic! song and one of the lines just sums it up
I don't love you, I'm just passing the time.
It's like, I know I don't love him anymore, but when I'm sitting around and thinking, my thoughts land on him, and It's mainly just passing the time by thinking about him.
Weird? Yeah, I thought so too, but mehh...
It's really hard, but I am trying. Really really trying my best, but just, ARGH!

No one told me it was this hard ):

We've Made Contact!!

After, like, two (maybe three) months, My ex boyfriend spoke to me.

So what?

It's like a major breakthrough for me because its not even like I provoced him or anything, I didn't start the conversation, and yeah, it was about school and stuff, but it's still a conversation isn't it?

It's weird really, but yeahh, I've just saw a picture of him and his current girlfriend, they look sweet together, and honestly, I'm not really too bothered by seeing it. No pang of jelousy, No regrets, No "gosh, I wish I was her", just "awhhh sweet".

But I have to say, I honestly don't know what they have in common, they share no common intrests as far as I know, she listens to totally different music to him (I'm not a stalker, I just know she loves JLS wereas he hates them) but mehh.

I want to go to the park,

not sure why really,

I just have the urge to go to the park with a sketch pad or my writing book and do something creative, however, I can't because I have to do the stupid ironing In a bit ¬¬

x